I easily cry nowadays. Don't know why. Maybe I feel ugly or insecure. Maybe I feel imperfect. Maybe I feel I have so many flaws. Maybe I'm just depressed.
Kememeh la aku nih! Benci!
Maybe I'm just pregnant.. sigh...
I pray to Allah for the safety of my child and myself. I hope to delivery her safely and in a normal way. I pray for our health too. I pray she's perfect physically and mentally. I pray she makes me happy. Aminnn.....
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
A day to comfort my Depression
Yesterday I purposely took a day off because my head was not in place. I was depressed after going through some difficulties with myself and my inner self, my health and what not! I was spotting the day before and went for checkup at HUKM. You can read my journey at Biq's. Thank you Biq and Elly for taking me to the hospital and to go through so much hassle!! It was everything from the spotting to the journey that just made me down. Yes.. yes... I'm easily depressed... so what??? I know my limits so shut up!
The alarm went off at 7 a.m. and I mumbled to Hubby that I didn't want to go to work. Then he said he'll accompany me. So we both went back to sleep. I guess he knew I was not mentally stable. I slept and slept and refuse to get up. At noon, hubby woke me and I came to realise I should continue my day as a wife. So, I quickly prepared a quick lunch (last nights dinner which I skipped). We lazed around the house, entertained by our adorable cat and re-bonding our love, since the night before I was behaving odd and emotional. Hubby was very patient with my depressed personality and was trying to make me feel better, although I know he isn't the kind to persuade.
Later Hubby took me out for McD's! Yeay! I was craving for it for the past 2 days (siap mimpi2 tau). Before that we went to AmBank to get the copy of my car grant. I made a call earlier, the original copy is at Yap Kwan Seng, but they told me to go to Wangsa Maju to collect the fax copy since I don't have a fax machine. It was easy, I thought... By the time I reached AmBank Wangsa Maju it was still early, about 3.15p.m. I told them what I wanted and they told me to wait. We waited until 4 p.m. and the guy at the counter called me. He said if I went to Yap Kwan Seng, it could have been faster. I stared at him and said, "Sama je lambat, sana kena tempuh traffic jam lagi, parking lagi.. heii... takyah la.. baik sini.. fax aje kan?". Then he told me he had trouble contacting them and asked me for their extension number. Excuse me? You are asking ME for YOUR HQ branch number?? Do you want me to teach you management? Because I have a list of what you can do to contact the bloody HQ Branch! I just talked to them, goddammit! And I just sat down again and prepared my speech, just in case they couldn't get my copy. Why the hell don't they have directories to their own HQ and branches?? Aren't they carrying the same products? Fine, do it the hard way. Make a fool of yourselves by asking your customers for your own numbers. Funny..
Later we ate at McD's. Joking about Hubby's friends and all. Then he mentioned he wanted to eat steamboat for dinner (now it's his turn to crave). So we quickly went to Giant to buy the ingredients. I bought my coconut drink which I craved since a week ago.
We head home and laze some more. Played the PS2. Played with the cat. Then had our steamboat dinner. I think we spent an hour finishing our dish! Thanks to my friend, Esmi for the steamer as a wedding gift. I was darn full I couldn't even lie down!
And so we watched tv, chatted, gossiped, laze some more and more... and straight to bed.
Thank you Hubby for a wonderful lazy day. You're very caring and romantic. Hanging out with you is always my pleasure. I'm now feeling better and happy as usual. As long as you're with me, everything will be alright. You don't know how little a sweet gesture from you could change how I feel. Love you sweetie!
The alarm went off at 7 a.m. and I mumbled to Hubby that I didn't want to go to work. Then he said he'll accompany me. So we both went back to sleep. I guess he knew I was not mentally stable. I slept and slept and refuse to get up. At noon, hubby woke me and I came to realise I should continue my day as a wife. So, I quickly prepared a quick lunch (last nights dinner which I skipped). We lazed around the house, entertained by our adorable cat and re-bonding our love, since the night before I was behaving odd and emotional. Hubby was very patient with my depressed personality and was trying to make me feel better, although I know he isn't the kind to persuade.
Later Hubby took me out for McD's! Yeay! I was craving for it for the past 2 days (siap mimpi2 tau). Before that we went to AmBank to get the copy of my car grant. I made a call earlier, the original copy is at Yap Kwan Seng, but they told me to go to Wangsa Maju to collect the fax copy since I don't have a fax machine. It was easy, I thought... By the time I reached AmBank Wangsa Maju it was still early, about 3.15p.m. I told them what I wanted and they told me to wait. We waited until 4 p.m. and the guy at the counter called me. He said if I went to Yap Kwan Seng, it could have been faster. I stared at him and said, "Sama je lambat, sana kena tempuh traffic jam lagi, parking lagi.. heii... takyah la.. baik sini.. fax aje kan?". Then he told me he had trouble contacting them and asked me for their extension number. Excuse me? You are asking ME for YOUR HQ branch number?? Do you want me to teach you management? Because I have a list of what you can do to contact the bloody HQ Branch! I just talked to them, goddammit! And I just sat down again and prepared my speech, just in case they couldn't get my copy. Why the hell don't they have directories to their own HQ and branches?? Aren't they carrying the same products? Fine, do it the hard way. Make a fool of yourselves by asking your customers for your own numbers. Funny..
Later we ate at McD's. Joking about Hubby's friends and all. Then he mentioned he wanted to eat steamboat for dinner (now it's his turn to crave). So we quickly went to Giant to buy the ingredients. I bought my coconut drink which I craved since a week ago.
We head home and laze some more. Played the PS2. Played with the cat. Then had our steamboat dinner. I think we spent an hour finishing our dish! Thanks to my friend, Esmi for the steamer as a wedding gift. I was darn full I couldn't even lie down!
And so we watched tv, chatted, gossiped, laze some more and more... and straight to bed.
Thank you Hubby for a wonderful lazy day. You're very caring and romantic. Hanging out with you is always my pleasure. I'm now feeling better and happy as usual. As long as you're with me, everything will be alright. You don't know how little a sweet gesture from you could change how I feel. Love you sweetie!
Thursday, October 23, 2008
In Memory of LeRoi Moore
I just knew today... My favourite band; Dave Matthews Band's saxophonist, LeRoi Moore passed away on 19 August 2008.
Rest in Peace... LeRoi Moore (1961-2008)
Rest in Peace... LeRoi Moore (1961-2008)
Projekt AK @ NTV7
My favourite local indie band would always be Projekt AK, period. They've been around ever since I started learning how to be street wise. Those were the days when we want to rebel, seeking for freedom, searching for your own identity... sigh... Those were the days... Gigs before were something to look forward to. And for a period, the gig scene kinda died. Now I see it rising again.
After the phenomenal era of the rock kapak, I seriously hated the local scene. Nothing beats the original rock kapak. Then came the rock leleh. Ok that's when I hated the local music scene. Alternatively, indie bands were the youth's choice. That's why at the time, indie bands were doing so great. You'd be surprised to know those youngsters play better than the mainstream artists. Indie bands make music. Mainstream bands just play, according to song producers and composers, just to hit their market sales. I have nothing against our local artists. I just prefer underground music. Baru feel...
Projekt AK's latest lineup are Rudy (Vocal), Faizal (Drums), Syami (Guitar), Andy (Bass) and Amy (Guitar). Though Amy chooses not to perform in gigs due to personal matters, he definitely plays a big role in the band, always. They are currently busy recording their latest album, title yet to be defined. Fans will notice the biggest difference is that there won't be anymore rapping in the album. They've all matured to a different approach but still maintaining the Funk genre. Agak kelakar la kalau nak tengok Rudy terkinja-kinja sambil rapping at his age la kan? I'm not saying that he can't, though. And I'm not saying he's old too.. hahaha... but I ain't saying he's young either. None of them are anyways. Whatever it is, true fans will want to listen to them no matter what.
So if you're a fan, was a fan, or wanting to be a fan, check them out tomorrow!
PROJEKT AK
Channel: NTV7
Show: 1...2...Jus! (Guest performing artist)
Time: 8.30 pm (I guess they will appear around 9.10pm..?)
If......... you missed the show, you can watch the reruns on Sunday I think (Astro) what time I don't know, or stream the reruns online at NTV7 website, but you can't forward or rewind.. which is a turnoff, plus if you're using Maxis Broadband jangan harap la nak tengok secara aman...
Enjoy!
After the phenomenal era of the rock kapak, I seriously hated the local scene. Nothing beats the original rock kapak. Then came the rock leleh. Ok that's when I hated the local music scene. Alternatively, indie bands were the youth's choice. That's why at the time, indie bands were doing so great. You'd be surprised to know those youngsters play better than the mainstream artists. Indie bands make music. Mainstream bands just play, according to song producers and composers, just to hit their market sales. I have nothing against our local artists. I just prefer underground music. Baru feel...
Projekt AK's latest lineup are Rudy (Vocal), Faizal (Drums), Syami (Guitar), Andy (Bass) and Amy (Guitar). Though Amy chooses not to perform in gigs due to personal matters, he definitely plays a big role in the band, always. They are currently busy recording their latest album, title yet to be defined. Fans will notice the biggest difference is that there won't be anymore rapping in the album. They've all matured to a different approach but still maintaining the Funk genre. Agak kelakar la kalau nak tengok Rudy terkinja-kinja sambil rapping at his age la kan? I'm not saying that he can't, though. And I'm not saying he's old too.. hahaha... but I ain't saying he's young either. None of them are anyways. Whatever it is, true fans will want to listen to them no matter what.
So if you're a fan, was a fan, or wanting to be a fan, check them out tomorrow!
PROJEKT AK
Channel: NTV7
Show: 1...2...Jus! (Guest performing artist)
Time: 8.30 pm (I guess they will appear around 9.10pm..?)
If......... you missed the show, you can watch the reruns on Sunday I think (Astro) what time I don't know, or stream the reruns online at NTV7 website, but you can't forward or rewind.. which is a turnoff, plus if you're using Maxis Broadband jangan harap la nak tengok secara aman...
Enjoy!
Monday, October 20, 2008
Borang Permohonon Rebat Tunai Kenderaan Persendirian
Today I claimed the RM625 personal car rebate from the post office. It was an easy procedure. I downloaded the form from here, filled up my details, brought along my IC and queued for an hour at the post office. Once I was at the counter, I just handed over the form and IC, waited for the guy at the counter to check my status online, then he handed me the stamp pad for me to chop my thumbprint on the form and he handed me the cash... easy weasy... I didn't even muttered a word.
So boys and gals, don't forget to get your rebate!
So boys and gals, don't forget to get your rebate!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Back to Work...
Yeap, it's Tuesday and I'm back in the office... moodless! Raya was great for me. I had a last minute shopping before going back to kampung. I'm surprised hubby was so so so patient while I shop. I can be very choosy at times. But it didn't take long, 3 hours of shopping, you think? I used to shop from day to night. That was when I was 21. Full of energy and the will to look good. Now I'm married with a baby inside me, I did mellow down a lot!
So, 3 days before raya we drove back to Kampung Gajah. I tell you we spent a lot. Buying chicken and stuff for raya prep. I slept a lot too at kampung because the weather was so hot! And fasting too for the last few days.
As usual on Raya day, the guys would go for prayers while the girls prepare food. Relatives would come in a big group, without fail. I didn't help much, I guess I babysit most of the time. This year we have 4 newborn nephews, where 2 of them are twins. Imagine the cries.. hehe..
Later, we'd as for forgiveness from each other, starting from the eldest to the youngest. Asking forgiveness from my husband is the most touching moment every year. Without finishing my sentences we'd both go into tears. It's like reminding us how much we depend on each other and why we're together in the first place. Of course along the way, we hurt each other unintentionally despite loving each other to death. As my friends always describe our love as Cinta Mati (macam cintan maut la). We are passionate people, I must say.
The highlight of this hari raya is of course our vacation in Penang with my family (for me la at least). We'd stay at our usual place; Century Bay. But this time Berjaya has taken over the management and they totally suck in managing the service apartment there. We've been returning to the same service apartment for more than 5 years, and this year must be the worst service we've ever received. The room given was a wreck. Toilet door looked like it had been hit by an elephant or something. My poor sis had to sleep on a Hospital Bed with tilam span (used to be wooden single bed frame with spring mattress)! They charge RM40 for the iron and gas (for cooking). Washing machine looked like it had been kungfu chopped by Bruce Lee. The list goes on.. But it's okay. I'll try to find alternative next year.
On Friday, we went to Ferringhi to shop! Hubby and I were busy looking for anything to decorate our dull house. We managed to get a few and I spent around RM110 for 2 beautiful pieces. I must admit I didn't get the best offer for myself, probably I was already too tired then. But I did bargain like hell for my sis's dress, accessories and loads more. She was shopping like a queen! And I was the confidante bargaining at her side.. haha.. We then continued to eat at Gurney drive but we went there a little too late. So we had to continue our food journey the next day.
Saturday, we visited our Aunt's house, also at Ferringhi. We didn't eat a lot as we were saving our tummy for more food! On the way down from the open house, we stopped by Tanjung Bungah for laksa and rojak. Damn it was good! Later, my parents and us (me, hubby, sis and bro) split up for different choice of activities. We went on to meet Jibam and Syami nearby our apartment which later led us to Bayan Lepas for Char Kuey Teow. But we couldn't eat no more. Trying to save some space for Gurney. And later, at Gurney was more rojak buah, laksa, muachi, sotong, etc. My stomach was about to explode with all the yummy food!
Sunday, our grand finale. We stopped by our late grandma's graveyard to say some prayers for her. And then we were off for our last chance to eat whatever we can. Padang Brown was first. Pasembor (doesn't taste like it used too), bubur cha-cha, sup urat. And then Jalan Kapitan Keling for nasi kandar. I was longing for telur sotong, which had been sold out for the past 2 days! Thank God it was available or else my baby would be drooling all over! haha.. that's what they say.
After a few more stops for nutmeg and jeruk, it was time to go home. Traffic was bad before Tapah, but after that it was okay.. moving but not fast.
This Hari Raya was spent lavishly. Since hubby and I received some bonus from the company and this year we were able to take one week leave. And now, I'm broke.. hahaha.. but happy... Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir Batin!
So, 3 days before raya we drove back to Kampung Gajah. I tell you we spent a lot. Buying chicken and stuff for raya prep. I slept a lot too at kampung because the weather was so hot! And fasting too for the last few days.
As usual on Raya day, the guys would go for prayers while the girls prepare food. Relatives would come in a big group, without fail. I didn't help much, I guess I babysit most of the time. This year we have 4 newborn nephews, where 2 of them are twins. Imagine the cries.. hehe..
Later, we'd as for forgiveness from each other, starting from the eldest to the youngest. Asking forgiveness from my husband is the most touching moment every year. Without finishing my sentences we'd both go into tears. It's like reminding us how much we depend on each other and why we're together in the first place. Of course along the way, we hurt each other unintentionally despite loving each other to death. As my friends always describe our love as Cinta Mati (macam cintan maut la). We are passionate people, I must say.
The highlight of this hari raya is of course our vacation in Penang with my family (for me la at least). We'd stay at our usual place; Century Bay. But this time Berjaya has taken over the management and they totally suck in managing the service apartment there. We've been returning to the same service apartment for more than 5 years, and this year must be the worst service we've ever received. The room given was a wreck. Toilet door looked like it had been hit by an elephant or something. My poor sis had to sleep on a Hospital Bed with tilam span (used to be wooden single bed frame with spring mattress)! They charge RM40 for the iron and gas (for cooking). Washing machine looked like it had been kungfu chopped by Bruce Lee. The list goes on.. But it's okay. I'll try to find alternative next year.
On Friday, we went to Ferringhi to shop! Hubby and I were busy looking for anything to decorate our dull house. We managed to get a few and I spent around RM110 for 2 beautiful pieces. I must admit I didn't get the best offer for myself, probably I was already too tired then. But I did bargain like hell for my sis's dress, accessories and loads more. She was shopping like a queen! And I was the confidante bargaining at her side.. haha.. We then continued to eat at Gurney drive but we went there a little too late. So we had to continue our food journey the next day.
Saturday, we visited our Aunt's house, also at Ferringhi. We didn't eat a lot as we were saving our tummy for more food! On the way down from the open house, we stopped by Tanjung Bungah for laksa and rojak. Damn it was good! Later, my parents and us (me, hubby, sis and bro) split up for different choice of activities. We went on to meet Jibam and Syami nearby our apartment which later led us to Bayan Lepas for Char Kuey Teow. But we couldn't eat no more. Trying to save some space for Gurney. And later, at Gurney was more rojak buah, laksa, muachi, sotong, etc. My stomach was about to explode with all the yummy food!
Sunday, our grand finale. We stopped by our late grandma's graveyard to say some prayers for her. And then we were off for our last chance to eat whatever we can. Padang Brown was first. Pasembor (doesn't taste like it used too), bubur cha-cha, sup urat. And then Jalan Kapitan Keling for nasi kandar. I was longing for telur sotong, which had been sold out for the past 2 days! Thank God it was available or else my baby would be drooling all over! haha.. that's what they say.
After a few more stops for nutmeg and jeruk, it was time to go home. Traffic was bad before Tapah, but after that it was okay.. moving but not fast.
This Hari Raya was spent lavishly. Since hubby and I received some bonus from the company and this year we were able to take one week leave. And now, I'm broke.. hahaha.. but happy... Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir Batin!
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